Holding Multitudes
Why love and pain are never far from each other
I didn’t realize it at first, but if you’ve read my last two posts, you may have noticed that one was about grief and the beauty of memories, while the other was about beauty itself - about experiencing it in profound but fleeting moments throughout our days and weeks, if only we stay open and aware.
It’s interesting to me that these two topics seem contradictory at first. Or are they?
Admittedly, I was hesitant to share the post about my friend’s passing. Who wants to read about that? I suppose people want upbeat, hopeful, maybe funny or optimistic topics. Since I’m a photographer, people probably expect writing about photography itself - technique, cameras, film, all the exciting possibilities of the craft.
But, honestly, I can’t be bothered.
I’ll leave that to the people who love geeking out over gear, film stocks, camera systems, and all the technical ways of experiencing photography.
It’s funny how, once you start publishing regularly online, you begin worrying about what people want to read instead of what you yourself want - or need - to write.
I expected people to unsubscribe after I shared my post about loss. I imagined them thinking: “Why does she always write about these things? The pain of life? I already have enough to deal with.”
Yes. Don’t we all.
Oh, the thoughts that go through my head sometimes.
The truth is, these two posts, written only one week apart, express exactly why I started writing in the first place. They express what I’m most interested in exploring: the human experience on earth, with everything that it entails.
Because grief and beauty are never very far from each other.
Pain and love are deeply linked, and perhaps we wouldn’t fully experience one without the other.
The other day, I listened to an interview with Rachel Goldberg-Polin, whose son was kidnapped during the October 7 attacks and later killed after months in captivity. Without going into too much detail, it was one of the most honest and compelling interviews I’ve ever listened to.
Two things she said have stayed with me.
She described grief as a badge of love that she will wear for the rest of her life.
And she described her book as being about “love and pain, and pain and love.”
What a profound description of life itself.
Because it truly is a privilege to love deeply, to be loved deeply, and to experience that kind of connection as human beings. And if we hold onto that truth, then grief becomes, in some way, evidence of that love having existed at all.
There’s also something mysterious about the way sadness and joy can coexist. In the midst of grieving someone’s life ending, I can suddenly experience a moment of complete joy while noticing the beauty of this world. To me, that is what makes life rich and meaningful.
That is what I return to, again and again.
It’s the reason I create. It’s what I create from. And it’s what I want to keep saying, over and over again:
We are complex human beings, capable of holding multitudes.
We can hold two, three, or more truths at once. We can feel sadness while experiencing deep love. We can mourn a loss while still encountering joy and beauty.
I also believe grief can open us to even greater beauty.
As a human being, a woman, an artist, and a mother, I don’t want to miss out on either. Life is fragile.
And so I will continue writing about both.
Thank you, as always, for being here!
Items of Note:
I updated my website with more to come, but for now, go check it out. It includes an updated “mentoring” site and upcoming workshops, a list I will continue to add to in the next coming weeks!
Creative Hour in May
Our next gathering is scheduled for Saturday, May 30, 2026, 11 am Central Time.
I will send out the meeting link a day or so before.
I hope to see you there!
I feel the same way when I write about the more personal -and sometimes sad things. But for me, it is important to write about the things I want to write about and not about what people might want to read. That is also something I value about your newsletter - you don’t pretend or try to please others by writing for them. To me, this is much more interesting than another gear review.
Oh, Manuela. I kept nodding as I read each paragraph. We’re likely cut from the same cloth as I’ve been experienced both the doubt and conviction to write and share what makes us human. And yes, it is the entire spectrum of emotions that make up a meaningful life. Keep going, keep staying true to yourself. That’s what keeps me coming back.